Alfred “Tosh” Lines


It has been under a week but to me this has felt like one beast of a wait. But i am glad to say it’s Finally over and my life is now complete. Maybe to you this is pure nonsense but to me it’s an art form possibly verging on the lines of ultimate perfection.

“Twisted Calligraphy At It’s Finest”

As soon as i awoke this morn the letter box was my main concern of the day, awaiting the flying postman and his parcels of joy, it had been four days now and the man in red had failed to produce the goods, but today just happened to be the day i have been waiting for

May i add tonight i am away from home and fueled by the inner workings of ice-cold bottles of  stella.

“One can not function without the correct minus chill of elite European larger”

Any way back to the whole reason for tonight’s post and the main man himself Kevin “Tosh Lines” Lloyd. Maybe your unfamiliar with such a character or maybe your to young to remember the genius at work. He was a renegade cop from sun hills finest who didn’t get his own way.

In 1998 possibly one on finest years known to man for BMX STREET innovation he was sacked from the bill for his lack of punctuality and failing to learn his lines. (POSSIBLE PUN) due to chronic alcoholism Within days, he was admitted to a clinic in Burton upon Trent for detoxification and was administered sedative medication, but then left the premises to drink alcohol. He returned to the clinic in an intoxicated state, retired to bed, fell asleep and choked on his vomit due to the mixture of sedatives and alcohol in his bloodstream.

He died just one week after his dismissal from The Bill. My take on this story is, Tosh had watched the recently released fear and loathing in Las Vegas and took it upon himself to take it one step further and hunt down the ultimate high, spitting on the American dream and going straight for the juggler.

Enough back ground material the main thing is i had a chance and i took it. I’m now the proud owner of an official Tosh Lines signed card. Some say i have bought into the rights to own his soul, can this be possible, can the rumors be true? are the myths actual non fiction and told from the back of some ones cluttered mind?

Can it be, before that fatal day on the  second of may 2008 , he even had enough life left in him to put hand to paper and sign such an insignificant piece of memorabilia? they do say the devil makes work for idle hands?  but surely his hands where full one clutching a mixed batch of narcotics the other wrapped around a bottle of Britain’s finest liquor.This whole raconteur tale has me questioning the cards authenticity and has me directed to the devil and his agenda of harnessing human souls. If these twisted tails are true  making us believe he has actually signed his soul away to the devil aka Beelzebub & Azazel, can this be the biggest trick tosh has ever pulled? convincing the world he never existed?

– refer to Kaiser Söze



One Response to “Alfred “Tosh” Lines”

  1. briketabreakfastclub Says:

    DC Tosh Lines was a crime fighter of savage proportions, a true maverick! Tosh was a renegade cop and he spat on crime! We’ll fuckin miss you Tosh. Tosh/Tash

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